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- FIRE MAGIC GAG - by ShadyPixel
- ---
- So, there should be this mini boss fight gag where the player is heading through
- a forest clearing and in the dead center, there is this odd ball character who thinks
- they are a great and powerful sourcerer. You can clearly tell they are not, especially
- with their torn, raggy outfit and stick as their weapon of choice.
- Your character just kinda stands there. Not in fear, but in pity for the fool (MR.T BITCH)
- Anyway, you kindly ask if you can pass around him without trying to hurt anybody.
- Then the guy just starts shouting at you, saying you are the one who brings death with them,
- (or some crazy idea from rumors, anyone can fill the void here with something)
- and states how there is absolutely NO WAY you can pass and defeat him.
- Your character still stands in awe... of being bored to death.
- Then the crazy guy says how his magic has blown through mountains and burned villages...
- Your character is really trying his/her best to pay attention
- (it would be funny if the text started fading off or something to show loss of interest)
- Finally, the sorcerer just gets fed up,
- saying that he is going to prepare his CHARGED FIRE ATTACK.
- (Maybe a little suspense music gag that Joe whips up for like 15 seconds could be placed here)
- The sorcer prepares his magic attack, by raising his hand in the air, then nothing happens.
- Then he grabs a piece of paper and struggles lighting it on fire with a lighter.
- He crumbles the paper up into a ball and throws it at you. It didn't go far from him.
- He gets flustered, but still asks if you were scared. You just stand there in awe.
- He shouts that this time it is gonna be the real deal. He does the same tactic, and fails.
- Then he just stands there looking at you.
- Sorcerer: "WELL, LOOKS LIKE FIRE MAGIC ISN'T HAPPENING TODAY..."
- There is a silence between the two of you in this open area.
- Sorcerer: "FINE. FORGET IT. HOW ABOUT THIS? TAKE THIS KNIFE, AND STAB YOURSELF."
- He tosses it to you with a wimpy throw. It's directly between you two.
- Sorcerer: "YES. JUST WALK OVER. PICK IT UP, AND KILL YOURSELF"
- (The whole point is that this poor guy thinks he is a great villian, and you have the
- option to kill yourself to make this guy feel better about having to had slain a hero.
- In reality, he is fucking harmless. Scared to do anything. It's just a pity move on your
- part if you want to do it or not.)
- Then you have the option of just walking away (which results in nothing)
- or "stabbing yourself" to insta-kill you, but you will respawn in the next area.
- INSTANT DEATH OPTION:
- You decide to be a bro (for some reason) and head over to the middle of the area and pick
- up the knife in the center of the area. You instantly die, and just lay down dead.
- The sorcerer gets shocked.
- Sorcerer:
- "OH MY GOD ARE YOU OK? HOLY HELL THAT MUST OF HAD TO HUR-
- Wait.
- Oh my gosh, he...DIED. AT MY HAND. YES!
- I AM TRULY A VILLIAN WORTH KNOWING!
- I CAN FINALLY BE APART OF THE *insert possible boss name* FAN CLUB!
- FOLK WILL DREAM IN FEAR OF ME, AND THEIR KIN AS WELL!
- I AM THE ONE WHO RESTS IN THE SHADOWS! IN THEIR NIGHTMARES!"
- He begins to laugh manically, and then uses a teleport spell to dissapear.
- You then respawn instantly after he is gone, then proceeed to the next area.
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